Head Scratcher #1: The Heavy Bolter

Hopefully the first in a series of similar posts, where I examine and tear down the things I don't like about 40k. Well, that's not very nice; let me backtrack. I like 40k, but it's not perfect, and there are some things that really bug me, and I want to puzzle it out.

For my first headscratcher, I'd like to pick on something that has really bugged me for some time; the humble Space Marine heavy bolter.

Image borrowed from the Games Workshop site.

Step back for a moment, if you will, and consider how utterly ridiculous this weapon is, and how awkward it must be to hold and fire. I'm not a gun maker, and I don't pretend to know anything about guns apart from what I've seen in movies and video games, but come on. Can you, reader, think of any gun that looks like the heavy bolter? I bet you can't. It just really bothers me from a practical point of view. It just looks so awkward and cumbersome to hold, that I just don't see how it could be effective as a weapon.

There are some other problems too, in my opinion. What the heavy bolter is essentially supposed to be, is a squad automatic weapon. Modern warfare is based around suppressing fire and flanking. In a squad or fireteam, you have the one guy with the SAW or light machine gun if you prefer, and he's supposed to lay down a lot of suppressing fire.

If we have a combat squad or fireteam of 5 Astartes, I would argue that a storm bolter would be far more effective and practical as a SAW. If a heavy bolter is indeed intended to be a SAW, it would be woefully inefficient, as you are shooting bigger, higher caliber shells just to suppress. A storm bolter has two barrels, obviously, so it would be quite good for spewing bolts everywhere and suppressing. And a storm bolter uses the same .75 ammunition as a bolter and bolt pistol, so that reduces logistical problems because everyone uses the same ammunition. A storm bolter might be difficult to fire, but surely it can't be worse than the cumbersome heavy bolter, and there are examples like Pedro Kantor and the Grey Knights comfortably using wrist-mounted storm bolters, which are if anything even more silly. Although, this may be because they are just bigger and more badass than rank and file Astartes. One other little benefit is that an Astartes should be able to carry a little more ammunition in his back-mounted ammo pack.

Heavy bolters have a place in my Chapter, sure, and in any Chapter. But may I suggest that my heavy bolters be modeled so that they are more comfortable to hold? Like in this picture, with a "chainsaw grip" and a reverse grip on the top? Well, not "reverse" per say, but you get the idea:

borrowed from IMFDB

I guess it could be explained as a different pattern of heavy bolter, kind of like how there are about 20 different patterns of bolter.

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One slight addendum to this post. Bolters are seen as the signature weapon of the Astartes, with everyone else generally getting crappier and smaller caliber "bolters." But why are heavy bolters so widespread? One would think that heavy bolters would as difficult to manufacture as regular bolters, if not more so...